This is a living guide where I gather the supports that had the strongest impact in calming my nervous system and breaking the fear–pain cycle.
Right now, it highlights the first resources that truly helped me start this journey. This page is regularly updated with new books, apps and practices that prove valuable. If a tool earns a place here, it’s because it gave me real shifts in how my body feels.
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Disclaimer
This page is not medical advice – the tools I share are based on my personal experience. For your safety, check with a healthcare professional before using medical devices or trying new practices.
Books That Helped Me Calm My Nervous System
These were the first resources that gave me clarity and practical strategies.
8 Steps to Conquer Chronic Pain by Andrea Furlan
What it is: A step-by-step guide from a physician who specialises in chronic pain. The book blends medical knowledge with practical strategies, showing how lifestyle, mindset and body practices can all support recovery.
Why it helps: It takes complex science and translates it into simple, memorable formulas like “all pain is real” and “you can train your brain.” By doing so, it makes pain science approachable and gives clear, actionable steps for change.
My experience: This was the first book I ever read on chronic pain and it made a huge impression on me. I was struck by how well structured it was, how clearly Dr. Furlan explained difficult concepts and how much relief I felt just from reading it. For the first time, I understood that there is a solution: one that can be reached through practical, daily steps. I read this book with a notebook, post-its and a pen in hand, underlining and marking the pages that spoke directly to me.
What it is: A widely recognised book in pain science that explains how fear and pain fuel each other, keeping the nervous system stuck in danger mode. It introduces Pain Reprocessing Therapy, an approach now discussed in the specialty literature for treating chronic pain.
Why it helps: It translates complex neuroscience into simple, practical methods that show how to end the fear–pain cycle and retrain the brain to feel safe again.
My experience: This book helped me look at pain in a lighter way, learn how fear can take over our lives and discover how to begin breaking the fear–pain cycle. It convinced me that with the right approach, the brain can be retrained to turn the pain down. What makes this book so powerful is Allan Gordon’s tone. His approach is friendly, simple and deeply honest. He comes across as practical, but also human, never distant or too clinical. And humor plays a big part: he manages to talk about chronic pain, one of the heaviest topics, with warmth and wit. That balance stole my heart right from the beginning. Even now, whenever I feel low, I go back to this book for reassurance. It continues to remind me that pain isn’t the enemy – fear is – and that with small steps and a bit of humor, it’s possible to loosen the cycle.
Side note: Personally, I found more joy in reading Allan Gordon’s book. Maybe it was the humor or maybe because it felt a little less overwhelming than Dr. Furlan’s. Still, both are amazing in their own way and each has an important place on my shelf.
Everyday Practices to Calm a Dysregulated Nervous System
These are simple, no-cost actions that send consistent safety signals to your nervous system. I use them daily and over time they’ve made my system less reactive.
Breathing & Relaxation (coming soon)
A few minutes of slower breathing or guided relaxation helps quiet the body’s alarm system. Even focusing on longer exhales can shift your body into rest-and-digest.
Safety Messages (coming soon)
Gentle self-talk like “I’m safe right now” or “It hurts, but I’m safe – my body is only protecting me” teaches the body to feel less threatened. I often use these phrases when pain or stress flares up.
Gentle Movement
What if moving could feel safe again? Learn how simple daily actions can calm your nervous system and reshape how your body experiences pain.
→ Discover the full explanation and gentle approach to movement and chronic pain.
Reframing Pain
Shift how you interpret pain and reduce fear with simple steps.
→ See the full explanation and step-by-step practice here for chronic pain reframing.
Somatic Tracking for Pain (coming soon)
Learning how to observe sensations in the body with curiosity rather than fear. This helps reduce hyper-alertness and teaches the brain that pain isn’t always dangerous.
Emotion Processing (coming soon)
Making space for emotions like anger, sadness or fear instead of pushing them down. This reduces the stress load that keeps the nervous system stuck in danger mode.
These practices are only part of the picture. The nervous system is also shaped by things like diet, sleep and daily habits – areas that can play just as big a role in recovery.
Practical Tools and Body Techniques to Relieve Pain and Calm the Nervous System
What it is: A small device that delivers mild electrical pulses through the skin to stimulate nerves and help manage pain.
Why it helps: My physiotherapist explained that TENS can reduce pain by interfering with the signals traveling to the brain and by stimulating the release of endorphins, the body’s natural painkillers. Used correctly, it helps the nervous system feel less “on high alert” and creates space for safer movement.
My experience: This was recommended and taught to me by my physiotherapist – including why, how and when to use it. I learned to keep the intensity at a comfortable level, never pushing too hard. I often use it when I’m moving around, walking, working or sitting – situations that trigger pain and fear. With TENS, my pain sensations decrease, making those activities feel less overwhelming. I also have endometriosis and during painful periods, it’s been amazing: the TENS unit allowed me to move more freely and even do gentle exercise when normally I would feel stuck.
Heating Pad for Back Pain Relief
What it is: A thin, flat electric pillow that can be warmed up and placed on painful areas. It’s easy to store or pack, which makes it practical for daily use.
Why it helps: Heat improves blood flow, relaxes muscles and provides a soothing sensory signal that can calm the nervous system. Research supports heat therapy for easing back pain, muscle tension and menstrual cramps, as well as for promoting relaxation.
My experience: My traumatologist recommended this to me and advised using it no more than twice a day, 20 minutes per session and always at the lowest comfortable temperature. I usually apply it on my lower back and sometimes on my upper back. I’ve learned to use it in different ways: when pain starts growing so I can avoid taking painkillers too often, before activities that require a lot of energy from me and every night before bed to help me relax. The warmth not only relieves pain but also brings mental ease: because I’m lying down while using it, I often pair the sessions with meditation, breathwork or listening to something pleasant. Over time, it’s become one of my most reliable and soothing tools.
Soft Brush for Desensitization
What it is: A gentle brushing technique used on the skin to reduce sensitivity and teach the body that touch is safe. You don’t need a special medical tool – a soft everyday brush works and a skin marker to map the boundaries.
Why it helps: Brushing gradually retrains the nervous system so that normal touch doesn’t feel like danger, easing tension and reactivity.
My experience: My physiotherapist recommended this technique and showed me how it works. I learned to start with one area at a time, carefully keeping the boundaries of the “map” I was working on and only moving to another area once I saw results. It was important to avoid brushing directly on reactive spots, since sensitivity can shrink or flare back up depending on stress or other pain in the body. I experimented with three different make-up brushes until I found the one that felt best. Each session lasts about 7 minutes, once a day and over time this simple practice reduced my sensitivity and made my body feel calmer.
Great Apps for Meditation & Nervous System Regulation (Coming Soon)
This section will feature apps that support nervous system regulation through guided practices, breathing or sleep support. Stay tuned – I’ll add the ones that truly make a difference.
Community & Nervous System Support Resources (Coming Soon)
Connecting with others is key for regulation. In this section, I’ll share places to connect, like supportive Instagram pages, videos and communities.
Disclaimer
This page is not medical advice. The tools here are based on my personal experience and what has helped me calm my nervous system. Please consult a healthcare professional before trying new devices or practices.